


Smile For the Camera, Honies!

by FalonomAfterMidnight



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Cameras, Embarrassment, Gen, Hilarity Ensues, Humor, Interviews, Short One Shot, Shout-outs, Silly, TV News
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-11-04 22:54:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17907233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FalonomAfterMidnight/pseuds/FalonomAfterMidnight
Summary: Ronaldo pounces on the Diamonds for a surprise interview. Predictably, it doesn't go well.





	Smile For the Camera, Honies!

On the way back to the Beach House, Steven took out a special phone; it was a Diamond Communicator. He called the other Diamonds (who were on Homeworld) to invite them over for a little sight-seeing around the Beach City Boardwalk. They happily agreed without any complaints, and he told them that he couldn't wait to see them tomorrow. Nope, nothing could possibly spoil the fun day he had planned!

Overhearing this conversation from an area more hidden off, Ronaldo put on his thinking cap. He thought and thought for a very long time. Finally, a lightbulb lit up in his head. He pulled out his phone, and dialed a couple of numbers.

* * *

The very next day, the other Diamonds had arrived to Beach City. Because Steven had wanted to show them around with far greater ease, they shrunk down as soon as they exited their gargantuan ships. Yellow's and Blue's gems took up a huge portion of their torsos, while White rotated her gem so that the pointy end of it would be the only thing sticking out of her forehead (just like a horn).

Steven held Yellow's and Blue's hand with stars in his big eyes while White followed right behind them. "I can't wait to show you!" He said excitedly. "There's so much to see!"

"There they are! They're here!" And then, Ronaldo, as well as several other people behind him, jumped out right in front of the family.

"Is _that_ one of them?" Yellow asked Steven with a disgusted look on her face.

"Uh-uh!" Steven shook his head in sincerity, then turned back around and demanded, "Ronaldo, what's going on?"

"Since I knew you guys were gonna be here, I brought in a TV crew!" Ronaldo gestured to the guys wearing headphones, holding expensive equipment, and dressed in special uniforms standing right behind him.

The young boy stared blankly as his mouth hung open a little. "You did wha--HEY! Have you been eavesdropping!?" Steven then got pretty angry upon skimming through the implications of what Ronaldo had just said.

Ignoring him, the blonde just continued. "We're--I mean, _you three_ are gonna be on TV!" Ronaldo declared triumphantly, pointing his finger at the very surprised Diamonds.

"Ronaldo, they didn't even _consent_ to this--" Steven's rightful protests were unfortunately cut off by Ronaldo shoving him out the camera frame.

Ronaldo then turned to the cameraman standing right in front of him, and positioned himself. "Okay, now we're ready!" he whispered. Ronaldo took a finger out of his ear, held the microphone up to his mouth, and began speaking into the camera. "Hello, Delmarva. My name is Ronaldo Fryman, and we are here, live, in Beach City about to speak to the great Gem matriarchs who come from a faraway galaxy!" His glasses shined as he stated that last part.

"Oh, brother!" Steven groaned under his breath as he covered his eyes. This was gonna suck.

The older teen then walked over to White, and questioned her: "So, Your Majesty, can you tell our _thousands_ of viewers how you feel so far about your visit to planet Earth?" He was in fact, clearly exaggerating those numbers, but hey, whatever brought the ratings up.

White's eyes widened at the prospect of _thousands_ of Earth strangers watching and judging her every move. Being in front of so many Gems while trying to recite a flawless script was already uncomfortable enough! She tried to speak with that elegant and perfect air she normally had around her on Homeworld. She tried to be her curt and dismissive self with the reporter. She tried to say SOMETHING to the microphone in front of her. But she just froze up. "Um..." White stammered as a rose blush appeared on her cheeks.

"Excuse me?" asked Ronaldo, clearly _not_ expecting this kind of answer to come from a space goddess.

White, turning her head away and avoiding any sudden eye contact with the camera and Ronaldo, mumbled something that was little more than a soft whisper as her face flushed further.

"Sorry, what?" said the confused boy.

There was no response from the embarrassed radiant Gem, whose entire face and neck were now completely burning hot pink.

"...H-hello?" Seeing that they weren’t going to get a successful interview from her anytime soon, Ronaldo gave up and decided to just leave her be. He sighed, then dismissed her with a "...Okay." He then headed right over to Blue as White ran away to hide herself anywhere she could. "How about _you_ , my queen?" He asked the blue Gem. "How do feel about leaving your home planet to come here?"

Blue kept her travelling hood over her eyes. Like White, she was also very uncomfortable, but at least _she_ didn't freeze up. "I... do not have any opinions." Her very blunt answer came in the same soft-yet-stern voice she always used around her Gem subjects.

A hint of desperation could be heard in Ronaldo's voice as he said, "R-really? None at all?"

Blue pulled down the rest of her hood to fully obscure her face. "No."

"Excuse me, Blue!" Just then, Yellow entered the frame, and pushed Blue out to safety. "Then _I_ most certainly do!" Yellow screamed right into the microphone, causing it to emit a painful, screeching feedback noise that caused several people nearby (including Steven) to cringe and cover their ears. "This is an outrage! An invasion of privacy!" she furiously ranted. "Who exactly do you think you are?! Daring to interrogate the likes of us?!"

"M-Ma'am, please calm down!" the person holding the boom mike offscreen pleaded.

Before anyone could stop her, Yellow marched up and punched the camera with a mighty fist, shattering it into pieces and rendering it completely useless.

(The broadcast cut out as a "PLEASE STAND BY" card replaced the screen.)

Ronaldo tried to cool the golden Gem's fiery temper with a compliment. "W-well, aren't _you_ quite a strong lady!" he nervously praised. He would definitely have to eat his words, especially after Yellow started to angrily glare directly at _him_.

* * *

Much later, at the beach, Ronaldo and Peedee had arrived to apologize to Steven for today's big mess.

"Sorry about all this, Steven." Ronaldo grumbled while trying to navigate his cast-covered limbs.

It sure was a good thing that Steven didn't hate Ronaldo as much as he did for that jerk Kevin. "Well, next time you want to interview somebody, you just have to ask them first at least." Steven kept his arms crossed and his foot down firmly during his forgiveness. "Oh, and P.S: Eavesdropping on someone's plans is really, _really_ rude."

"I know, I know..." Ronaldo nodded sadly, causing his broken glasses to slip again.

Peedee then said, "Come on, let's go home." And so Peedee pushed his wheelchair-bound brother back to their house.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
